"breaking the silence..."

I chose today to break the two and a half month of blogger silence. So I have been back to the states for about three months now. I have been working as a seasonal hire for AMAZON.COM the most "customercentric" company out there, from home, here in Charleston, WV.

During these past couple of months I have been struggling about not being out on the "mission field." Now if you are reading this and have been on any of the missions teams that I have had any part in leading, you have probably heard these words come out of my mouth, "Missions is not one week out of your summer in a foreign country, it is reaching those who God has placed in your sphere or realm of influence, regardless of geographical location." HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I SAID SOMETHING LIKE THAT IN THE PREVIOUS 4 YEARS? But now, not being on a foreign mission field, I am living what I have preached.

A great friend and mentor, once told me, "Danbi... regardless of where God takes you... ministry is in you." During the months that I have been on furlough I remember his words and I cherish them and attempt to live them out, even if rather feebly sometimes.

This past weekend I had to opportunity to minister alongside a group of Godly, mighty women at a women's conference. We ministered to a group of women that were hungry for the things of God yet broken, bound-up, and jaded because of church as usual. A few weeks before that I was as a prayer counselor in Judgement House (which is like a Christian outreach that shows different scenes including heaven and hell scenes meant to bring people to a decision to follow Christ). And most recently, I volunteered in the nursery at church today. Now to you these three events may seem insignificant and not hold much weight. But to me, a Christ-follower that has "ministry in me" it was like water that quenches thirst, it was like sustenance alleviate hunger. It helped me to live up to what I have been so flippantly telling countless people who have passed through the gates of Roca Blanca as they return to the U.S. to do all these years, not necessarily understanding fully what they come back to face; business, taking care of families, working jobs and helping out in ministries at their churches, complacency or apathy of fellow Christians, and the list could go on.

I will close on this note, prior to going through Judgement House, I had a very wise man tell me I should go through it first. Initially, I did not want to, because I did not want to lose time and wanted to get started praying with people. But, trusting his better judgement I went through it. The thing that impacted me the most was the heaven scene. Jesus was played buy the junior high school pastor and he did a phenomenal job. As he was going to each person to hug them, I was contemplating man... "When I get to heaven, will I hear those words... well done my good and faithful servant." I began to wonder if all the things I had done in my life would be enough to hear those much desired words, "well done." Just as I was thinking those things, "Jesus" came to hug me and whispered in my ear, "My daughter, I know the things you have done and my reward is great for you and I am pleased."

As tears began to roll down my cheek, I was humbled by the fact that God, despite my mistakes and failures and insecurities, still chose to speak directly to me when my heart was questioning. Because what it all boils down to is the fact that as His daughter, my heart's desire and the driving force behind the many sacrifices I have made has all be for one piece of divine affirmation, "WELL DONE!"

As I sit here writing this, it is my desire to hear those words at the end of my life, knowing it will be the culmination of all my efforts, my obedience, my sweat, blood and tears. And that in that I will be able to accomplish no matter how great or how small all the things God has set out for me, which is essentially winning souls for the kingdom and make disciples of Christ out of them. I sincerely hope that it will become or is the principal focus and intent of your life.