just a feeling?

Call it hormones, call it being an emotional girl, or whatever. All I know is that on this particular day I just had to hold every single baby that came with in arms reach. No matter whether the kid was boogery or snot-faced, smelly, or soggy diapered, or not diapered. On this particular day something, caused me to want to hold each precious little life in my arms, cuddle them, pray for them, talk to them. This particular little guy had very ASIAN features, well mostly slanted eyes. He had the most contagious, radiant toothless smile. Enough to make my heart a melted mess. As I held him, this feeling from deep inside my gut just started churning. NO it was not diarrhea or upset stomach. It was something completely different. As it began to roll around I could feel my eyes misting over. He put his little head on my shoulder and just at the point I thought I might become a blubbering mess in front of everyone, one of the older nurses made an innocent comment.

"You know it will be you turn pretty soon."

With this little comment, a tear slide down my face. I am not sure if it was a tear because unlike most of my friends from university I was not even able to be at this point in my life, well because of the whole not having a husband thing or if this solitary tear was because my time to have this same joy was coming very soon. In any case, my maternal instincts just kicked into fifth gear, if I am not able to have any of my own yet, there are hundreds and hundreds of kids that I can begin to spiritually mother. Ten of which gave their lives to Jesus during the past two days of evangelism in a near by town, for which I had the immense privilege of leading to the father of all fathers Jesus.

It is very common for children in the mountains at this age to not have a name yet. Which was the case of this lil guy. I began suggesting names. I finally suggested Arnulfo. Which is his fathers name. And so that one is the name that the parents had recently decided on. So blogger world, meet Arnulfo.

Teaching good nutrition to impoverished and malnourished

On a recent village trip to El mosco we had the opportunity to speak to 180 children on the importance of nutrition. As we talked about the need for fruits and vegetables, my heart was breaking with the realization that they were doing good to even be getting tortillas and if they were blessed beans and eggs. As their faces and shiny black eyes peered back at us, I secretly wondered how many of them would be caught up in the sickening cycle of povery, malnutrition, and sickness. How could they eat healthy if they could hardly afford to eat in the first place? How could they keep from getting sick if they did not have enough to eat and medicine? As these questions laid oppressively over my heart, I realized the only answer had to be Jesus. Not to be cliche, but if there was not corruption in government, more compassion in the church causing more than a hand full to take up the cause, greed which caused exploitation of a people group, a return of hope than these little ones would not know suffering. wow, what a sobering thought.


I left the car doors unlocked on the clinic base compound in El Mosco. The temptation for this lil guy was too much to withstand and thus he snuck into the car and stole my bananas and bag of dry toast. I did not mind so much. I am sure he needed it more than I did.

How refreshing it is to still be able to catch glimpses of what a life, a childhood should look like with out the worry of the next meal, looming sicknesses, and other grown up problems. A simple snapshoot of a happy moment in the midst of the myriad of bleak moments that are sure to mar her still young and tender life, if things do not change economically and socially. Worse still, if she does not come to know the maravelous love of the father. A foto to remind us all that we need to be taking up our cross in our daily lives, and giving of ourselves and lives that others may live the abundant life that Jesus offers to each and everyone of us.

Worth the Booty-numbness

I just got back from the great city of Houston, Texas. I had the privilege of attending a seminar on "House Churches" at Seoul Church/New Life Fellowship. It was incredibly impacting on several levels. I met incredible pastors and church workers that completely amazed me by their lives and ministry. I learned about the house church model of church that creates a real sense of ownership of the church by congregation members, instead of the weight of all responbility of the church weighing on the pastor's shoulders. I found out what it meant to be a true Christ Follower and that we all need to be about the building up of the church body and about reaching out to the lost. Here is a quote that really was like an arrow that pierced my heart,

Many are overly zealous about what they can do in a year, but underestimate what they can accomplish in five.

I came away from this conference physically tired [and several pounds heavier because of all of the excellent korean food] because I would leave my hosthome at 7:30am and not return until 10:30 at night sometimes. I sat for several hours in workshops until my booty would fall asleep but I can honestly say it was all worth it. I am so spiritually refreshed and recharged. I have a renewed outlook on what it is to be a servant leader. Thank you New Life Fellowship Seould Church, and especially the Cacalote House Church!!